Saturday, 15 June 2002
So, I’m not really bothered by what she looks like, but if you are... well, trust me, she looks exactly like you’d want her to. All I gave a damn about was that she was sitting opposite to me in the study area and staring dreamily into space. I kept sneaking looks at her unfocused eyes and trying to imagine what they were ‘seeing’. Intelligence, imagination and an ability to lose yourself: pretty much what I look for in a girl. I figured she was ‘off’ enough not to notice if I sneaked a look at what had sent her there. ‘Psychology of Advertising’—shit! She was in the same class as me! Of course! She sat at the front of the group, always asking clever questions. Well, I couldn’t ignore such a chance for a conversation.
“I know what you’re thinking,” I whispered to her.
She stirred from her dream, and looked at me. “What? How?” She looked a bit embarrassed. Hopefully it had been dirty.
“You’re thinking about our assignment, aren’t you?”
She broke into a relieved grin. “Yeah, sorry, I didn’t recognise you. I was miles away.”
“Yeah I noticed.” She looked like she was going to go back to her book, so I kept on talking.
“Everyone seems to be doing sexual symbolism, don’t they? What’re you doing?”
“I’m looking at the language used, how it affects you subliminally, kind of hypnotises you...”
I caught my breath—she’d said the magic word. “No way! I’m looking at the subliminal effects of images, but I’m really interested in the subconscious effects of language too. I was kind of torn, but I guess I’m more visual.”
“Yeah, I’m quite auditory.”
On a plate for me. “So are you, like, really clued up about all the effects words have on you’re unconscious?” Slow and regular, looking into her eyes.
“Well, kind of, some things always slip through though...”
“Yeah, there’s things you’re unconscious can’t pick up on, they just slip right into you’re unconscious without your consciousness knowing, or caring...” Was it my imagination, or was she looking slightly more glazed than before?
“Yeah, you’re unconscious is so much more powerful, it makes you do things without you even knowing why.”
Something was happening to her. Ms. Clever Answer was just agreeing with me. Time to try something. “I know what we should do.”
“We’ll meet up tonight, compare tapes of adverts and discuss what effects they’re having on you’re unconscious.”
“So see you about eight. Your place or mine?”
“When we meet up tonight.”
“Oh, right, mine, I guess...” she seemed to wake up a bit.
“Here’s my address, I think everyone else is going into a club in town, but I’ve got this bloody assignment, so I can’t.”
“Cool.” I walked off, trying to hide my euphoria. I didn’t know how much she’d been affected by my trick, but I’d got a date, so I didn’t care. All the signs were good.
When I turned up she seemed pleased to see me, she might have tidied up a bit even. Don’t blow this, I told myself. It wasn’t impossible she liked me: clever girls often go for clever guys, even if they’re not film star to look at. More than the other way ‘round anyway. We joked nervously a bit, trying to ignore the fact that we hadn’t really talked much before, and here I was, alone with her in her house. Watching the adverts and analysing them helped a lot though: showed her how intelligent I was, and told me a lot about her psyche. After a few hours, the conversation had degenerated to “That adverts crap!” levels, and she was looking a bit tired. I thought I should try something a bit more like what my cock wanted.
“Look, it’s a bit late to be working, let’s chill out for a bit,” I suggested, turning the TV off. She seemed relieved, rather than resentful, so I carried on acting like I owned the place. “Shall we put some music on?” I walked over to the CD collection, desperately hoping there would be something relaxing to put on.
“Yeah, good idea,” she said stretching. She was letting me take control of the situation, which was promising. I found an album that I knew was good for winding down to, and put it on. She made appreciative noises.
“Whew!” I sat down next to her, but in a position where I could see her face. “I’m really tired, aren’t you?”
“Mmmm.” She certainly looked only half awake, which I found arousing in itself. She seemed to veer between incredibly alert and very dreamy. Well, we just had to encourage the dreamy side, didn’t we?
“I get so tired after I’ve been thinking hard, don’t you?” I started.
“Yeah, I get to the point where I just don’t want to think any more.”
Well, I’ll see what I can do about that... “Yeah, it’s too hard to have to think all the time. It’s nice to just switch off your mind and relax sometimes.”
She smiled and leant back a bit. “Sure is... I do feel kind of relaxed around you. You really seem to understand how I feel, but maybe psychology students just know how to make you believe that...”
She was still thinking too much for my liking, I was careful to keep my voice slow and soothing. “Yeah, we always want to understand everything, but sometimes you should give up trying to understand and just accept things as they are...” she nodded vaguely, so I carried on, “Like now, you’re tired, so you should just accept it. It’s OK to be tired after you’ve been working hard. It’s OK to relax after you’ve been working hard. It’s OK to switch off your head after you’ve been working hard, and you have been working hard, so stop trying to fight it, just accept that it’s OK to be tired, it’s OK to relax, it’s OK to switch off your head...”
She was definitely responding: her eyelids were drooping and her breathing had become slow and regular. It was difficult not to leap on her then and there, but I persuaded myself that the wait would be worth it.
“Feel how nice it is to be able relax with someone you can trust, just relaxing and listening to a voice you can trust, letting yourself drift, listening to my voice. You can relax because you’re listening to my voice, my voice is helping you drift further away from everything, and you’re so happy to be able to relax, so happy to be listening to my voice, it’s so easy to do what my voice tells you because you trust my voice.” Her eyes were almost closed now, so I felt confident I had her where I wanted her.
“It’s time to let your eyes drift shut, that’s right, just let them drift shut, you don’t have to worry because you can still hear my voice, it doesn’t matter if you can’t concentrate on the words, your unconscious will hear them, you can just listen to the sound of the words, let the sound help you to relax, don’t think about the words, just let them slip into your unconscious, your conscious mind can just relax, gently drifting away as you listen to my voice...” She was definitely under: she had slumped down in the sofa and her mouth was slightly open. Her eyes had closed as soon as I had suggested it to her. Time for a few more suggestions.
“You’re so happy to be able to relax and not to have to think any more. Every word I say seems to help you relax more. Every word I say takes you deeper into the warmth and safety of my voice. You feel warm and safe when you listen to the sound of my voice. It’s very easy to do whatever my voice suggests. You don’t even have to think about it. You do what I suggest without thinking about it, don’t you? You’ll find it easy to answer me even though you’re so relaxed.”
“You like doing what I suggest, because it helps you to relax. It makes you feel good to do what I suggest. How does it make you feel to do what I suggest?”
“...good...” Her voice was soft, but clear.
My cock was straining at my trousers, but my other head remained in control of the situation. Much as I fantasised about fucking girls under hypnosis without their consent, in a real life situation, it would have made me feel like a shit. “I’m going to ask you some questions, and you’ll find it easy to be honest when you answer. In fact, you’ll find it makes you feel good to be completely honest with me. Is that OK?”
I gritted my teeth and asked a question that I wasn’t sure I’d like the answer to. “How did you feel about me before I came round tonight?”
“Ummm...” She looked slightly uncomfortable, and squirmed a bit. She must have really hated giving away her emotions.
“You’re completely safe, no-one else is ever going to hear about this. You can be totally honest with me because you trust me.” “OK...”
“So, what did you think of me?”
“I really liked you...”
“In what way?”
“I thought you were clever and funny, I was attracted to that, and I liked the way it made me feel when you looked at me...”
“How did it make you feel?”
“...Like you could see right into my mind...”
“And you liked that?”
She wasn’t exactly falling over herself to express herself. I wondered why. “Are you happy to tell me how you feel?” I asked.
I didn’t want to fuck her up if she had a real problem with this. “Oh yes!” She was surprisingly enthusiastic considering her previous hesitancy.
“Is there anything bothering you about it, though?”
“...I’m worried you’ll think I’m stupid...”
I almost laughed, she sounded so sweet. This was a completely different girl from the one I’d seen in class. “Don’t worry. You can be totally sure I won’t think anything bad of you. In fact I’ll think more highly of you the more honest you are. Just relax and be completely honest.”
She sighed and seemed to relax even more, if that was possible. “OK.”
“So why did you like the thought of me being able to see inside your mind?”
“Ohhh...I’ve always wanted to be completely understood. You looked like you could see all my fantasies and...”
“... and carry them out...”
“What kind of things? Remember you can tell me anything...”
“... um ... I wanted you to control me, ...my mind...” she tailed off looking embarrassed.
“Well done, you’ve been very honest and I like that.” I certainly did! “Do you understand that I’ve hypnotised you?”
“Yeesss!” She sounded euphoric.
“Does the idea of that...” I hesitated, even though I was pretty sure of the answer, I just couldn’t bring myself to believe it. “...turn you on?”
“Oh yes!” She smiled shyly and I thought I could see her rubbing
her legs together.
“That’s very good. It’s perfectly OK to be turned on by me hypnotising you. You don’t need to resist your feelings about this at all, in fact you can let go of any inhibitions you have about being aroused by this.” I was almost on autopilot. I’d always fantasised about persuading women to be turned on by me hypnotising them, but this gorgeous woman was doing it by herself! It was more exciting than I could have imagined. I didn’t need to feel guilty about what I was doing: she’d fancied me anyway, and liked being under my control! “What would you like to happen now?”
“Umm...” she looked slightly disappointed to be asked to make a decision.
“You must answer me, you want to answer me, because I am in control of your mind.” It sounded pretty corny to me, but I wanted her to be happy.
“I want you to fuck me!” she said breathily.
“Yes..., no..., um... a bit, but not completely... um I don’t know... you decide...” She really didn’t like making decisions, did she? I had to keep reminding myself that this was the girl who was usually more in control than the tutors!
“It’s OK, you don’t have to think any more.” She sighed and smiled peacefully. “You’re going to start waking up a bit, but not completely. You’ll remember everything that has happened while you were hypnotised.” Her eyelids fluttered, and she frowned a little. “You’ll still be very relaxed, you’ll talk and act as if you’re awake, but you’ll find it almost impossible to resist my suggestions. You can only resist if you feel very, very strongly about it. Otherwise, as you resist, you’ll feel my control over your mind growing, until you want to give in and do what I suggest.” Her eyes were opening, and she looked at me slightly sheepishly. “How do you feel?” I asked her.
“OK. I can’t believe you did all that! You were so lucky I liked it! Anyone else would have told you to fuck off.”
“Hey, calm down.” I stared into her eyes, and saw that my suggestion was working: she relaxed again. “Maybe I only did it because I sensed you were into that kind of thing? We did spend the entire evening talking about subliminal suggestions...”
“Yeah, I s’pose...”
Great, she bought it! I thought to myself, but it could have been true, I probably picked up signals without realising. I realised her housemates might be coming back soon and thought I’d try to get out of the living room. “Let’s go into your bedroom.” She hesitated slightly, so I made my voice as soothing as I could: “You don’t have to do anything you want to, but I think we both want to be somewhere private, so we can explore this...”
She nodded and led me up to her room, without saying anything. She should have remembered what she’d said when she was deeper, so she knew I wasn’t going faster than her subconscious wanted to... When we arrived I felt a little awkward again. I’d been in plenty of girl’s bedrooms for sexual purposes, but I really liked her, and didn’t want to fuck this up.
“Why don’t you tell me what you think I’m going to do?” I said playing for time. Maybe she’ll give some stuff away that she’d like.
She wrinkled up her nose. “Well, in the stories they always get the girl to strip and do dumb stuff, don’t they?”
I let the interesting piece of information about her reading habits pass, and looked deeply into her eyes. “But you know I’m not as shallow as that, don’t you?”
She nodded slowly.
I wouldn’t exactly have said ‘no’ if she’d implied that she’d have liked to strip, but it was kind of true that I wasn’t so bothered about that. “We’re both interested in how this affects your mind, aren’t we? If you control someone’s mind, you control their body anyway...”
She was breathing hard: I must be on the right track.
“As you look into my eyes, you feel your will slipping away...” I continued.
She seemed to be attempting to look away.
“...but you find you can’t look away, no matter how hard you try. You want to surrender control to me, so you can’t resist my voice. You want to do whatever I suggest... You ache to obey my suggestions...”
She seemed very aroused, her eyes were locked onto mine and her breathing was coming in rhythmic gasps.
“Lie down on the bed.” I commanded gently.
She obeyed with very little resistance; I remembered that I had suggested if she tried to resist doing something she really wanted to do, it would take her deeper under my control anyway. I knelt over her, taking her wrists in my hands and slowly moving her arms above her head.
“You don’t want to move these now,” I whispered and she moaned slightly. I seemed to be pressing her buttons successfully. We really were astonishingly compatible! I stroked her body through her clothes, and wherever I touched seemed to produce gasps of arousal. I wasn’t going to be able to keep on teasing her for much longer! “You want me to take your clothes off now, don’t you?” I asked, sounding more certain than I was.
“Yeess! And take off yours!”
I smiled. She was beyond pretending to fight her feelings. I stripped her carefully first, then took of my clothes, still slightly self-conscious, but she seemed to be looking hungrily at my body, writhing the lower half of herself around a little, with her arms held relaxed above her head. I stroked between her legs, whispering repetitive phrases in time with her thrusting: “You like this...it feels good...not to be in control...you feel more aroused...the more you give in to me...it feels good...to give in to me...you like...not to be in control...you feel aroused...when you give control to me...”
When she seemed close to orgasm, I took my hand away, continuing to talk to her as I put on a condom: “You’re so aroused...you want my cock in you...so you can give in to me more...so you can let me in you body...like I’m in your mind...” I slid into her, and tried to keep the rhythmic murmur going, “Open up to me now...I’m inside you...I’m controlling you deep inside...open up...open up...”
I can’t remember when I gave up talking, but we both came violently, and as I slid out she sighed in contentment. “Stay,” she murmured sleepily.
I gratefully lay down next to her, mumbling into her ear. “You can move your arms now, you want to get comfortable, and then you’ll drift off into a deep, relaxing sleep, feeling safe...deeply...safe...” I drifted off myself...
The next morning I felt fantastic, but as I realised where I was, I started to worry what she would think of the previous night’s activities when she woke up. I slipped out of bed and dressed quietly. As she still hadn’t awoken, I decided to go home, but leave a note so she wouldn’t get the wrong idea.
I’ve gone home to wash and change. I hope you enjoyed last night as much as I did, call me if you want to do some more studying...
I felt a little as if I was being a coward for leaving, but my feet were on their way down the stairs while my head was still thinking about it. Fortunately I didn’t meet any of her housemates on the way out, my head was still reeling from what had happened and I couldn’t have coped with such an embarrassing situation.
I was in a dream all day. My groin, my head and my heart all seemed to be fighting over which was the most affected. I couldn’t do anything constructive; I just drifted around, thinking
about what had happened, and hoping she’d call me.
Finally the phone went. I almost couldn’t answer, in case it wasn’t her, but I shoved the receiver to my face and somehow managed to mutter “Hello?”
“You sneaked off pretty sharpish!” It was her!
“Yeah, sorry, needed some clean clothes... I’d got all sweaty somehow...” I was trying to sound calm and in control, I don’t really know if I pulled it off.
“I just thought I’d see how you were, we could watch some more adverts if you like?”
I almost couldn’t believe it: she wasn’t cross with me! “So... was last night ... all right?” I asked, probably sounding as dumbstruck as I felt.
“What? Sorry I don’t remember anything after we turned off the telly. Did something happen?”
My heart sank, but then I heard her laughing softly.
“Sorry,” she continued, “I’m quite cruel in the daytime. You must have forgotten to use an amnesia suggestion; I remember everything. ‘Course I’m a bit worried you put in some other suggestions I have forgotten...”
“No, no,” I rushed to reassure her, “I wouldn’t do that kind of thing!”
“OK.” She sounded slightly sceptical, but more amused than anything. She was probably right to be wary: I might have done something like that if I hadn’t been too busy being amazed that it had been working. “So, are you coming round then?” She reminded me that I hadn’t answered her hint.
“Yeah! When? Now?” I’d totally blown my cool, hadn’t I?
“OK, now, immediately, now!” She was mocking me, but I didn’t mind. I was too excited to be about to see her again. “But watch out, I’ll be on my guard, this time...”
“I can get round that,” I whispered, trying to claw back some control. She sighed, and I hung up, feeling powerful.
As soon as she opened the door, I started staring into her eyes, hoping that she would go under immediately, so I wouldn’t have to be cool. She wasn’t that helpful, unfortunately.
“You know you look cross-eyed when you do that,” she said as she waved me into the house. I must have looked quite crest-fallen, because she hugged me and said “It’s OK, it’s cute.” I wasn’t really sure if that made it any better.
“So... What d’you want to do then?” I asked, feeling confused and embarrassed.
“Come into my bedroom, I want to show you something...” she said mysteriously. I followed her apprehensively, realising that I didn’t really know her that well—she might have decided to get back at me for the previous night in some horrible way. I was kind of right...
She had a video already playing on her TV, it seemed to be adverts, but not any I’d seen before.
“More homework?” I asked, a little disappointed.
“Kind of... See if you can figure out any subliminal messages...” I watched carefully, wanting to remind her how clever I was by figuring it out. They were quite strange adverts, long and very vague about the product. I felt myself growing a little bored. I yawned, and felt my eyelids drooping. This one was obviously sending sexual messages: eyes, lips, breasts; but I couldn’t quite hear what the soft, seductive voice was trying to sell me... soon it seemed easier not to worry about it and just drift...
I came to slightly, to find myself spread-eagled on the bed, with her riding me fiercely. I was incredibly aroused, but still felt relaxed and floaty, completely accepting the situation. When I realised what she must have done, I got even more aroused, but knew that I wasn’t going to come until she let me... which made me even more aroused...
I began to think I might be in love...
She looked into my eyes, panting softly. “So... How do you like it?” she asked.
I moaned. My mind was slippery.
“Is that a good moan?” She ground herself gently onto me.
I don’t know how, but I found myself answering, “Oh, God yes!” “You don’t hate me then?” She smiled.
“Oh, God no!”
“Good.” Her eyes started to glaze over, and her breathing was ragged. I could feel her starting to pulse around me. I thrust upwards, trying to remind her I was there.
“Oh ... My ... God!” She gasped. “Come! .... Come with me!” I couldn’t refuse.
“...waking up now, feeling relaxed, comfortable and ready to be completely honest with me...”
I stretched happily. “You sneaky little cow!”
I couldn’t be angry with her. “Yeah, OK, fair play.”
“So... what was it like?”
I was a little fuzzy, but she didn’t seem to have made me forget anything. “It was... it was fucking great!”
She laughed. “Good. I had a feeling you’d appreciate ... the other side of things.”
I thought about it. “Yeah, I wouldn’t have wanted to try it off my own bat, but it had certain ... advantages. How’d you know I’d like it?”
She looked calmly into my eyes. “Psychology.”